On a Lighter Note

After days of angsty, advice-seeking posts, I thought it was time for something funny. I found this humor article ("Coffee Date's Hidden Thoughts—Revealed!") by Mark Miller on the Huffington Post today and found it to be wonderfully accurate. I've gone on a number of dates like the one in the piece, though, fortunately, my rejects (including all of the ones I've rejected on the dating site before even contacting or meeting them) could only fill the stands at a high school gym and not a baseball stadium.

Second Date vs. Nth Date

As I mentioned in the comments on a recent post, I've reached the point of wanting to settle down. For good. Therefore, the stakes have changed for my dates. If I'm asked out and I accept, it's usually because the guy seems nice enough, though I usually don't have a lot of hope of him making it to a second date. However, if I ask a guy out, there's a huge difference—I want him to make it to the nth date, not just the second.

Such is the case with Theo. I had an excellent time with him Saturday night and I'd really like to see him again. Unless if I completely misread him as we said hasty goodbyes as I got off the train, he's interested too. I sent him a short message this morning, so now the wait begins.

In other news, I read this somewhat offensive column on Huffington Post today. Now, I have to start by saying that the author is a senior in college and a guy, so his perspective is likely to be different than mine anyway. Still, I can't say that I'd consider doing any of the things he mentions in his column. Would you?

Finding Mr. Right

With Valentine's Day only a few days away, the media is throwing countless dating stories at us. This year the hot topic is social media and dating—they had to find a new angle for a new year, but they all chose the same one…

Rachel Greenwald, author of Find a Husband After 35: Using What I Learned at Harvard Business School, has a new book out called Have Him at Hello: Confessions From 1,000 Guys About What Makes Them Fall in Love… or Never Call Back. She blogged about it today on the Huffington Post, focusing on four ways to find men in the digital age. In the post titled "Valentine's Day Book: Where Can I Find Mr. Right?" she says women too often ask "where" rather than "how." Her suggestions for how:

1. Using Facebook - Scroll through your friends' friends and ask for an introduction
2. Tweeting - Tweet details of a casual meeting, i.e., happy hour, and ask your friends/followers to bring friends
3. Meetup.com - Search for local singles groups
4. Teaching your own man-class - Teach a class on a topic about which men are often clueless, i.e., cooking; men will flock to the class, and hopefully some will ask you out after

Of these, I've done one of the four. After Henry and I split, I joined Meetup.com and joined a number of groups, including some targeted at singles. I've yet to go to any group designed for singles; however, I did meet Alex through a Meetup.com group. 

I have thought about asking my friends on Facebook to set me up on a blind date, but I've never looked at their friends to find a date.

I—and most of my friends—refuse to use Twitter (at least for my personal life). Therefore, I won't be using Twitter as she suggests.

Finally, teaching a man-class? I don't think so. I'm way too introverted.

Have you, dear readers, ever used any of these techniques to find a date? Please let me know.

Smart Women

I've recently become a regular reader of the Huffington Post, where I stumbled upon this article: "Why Do the Smartest Women Have the Toughest Time Dating?" by Dr. Alex Benzer (hypnotherapist and author of Tao of Dating, Tao of Persuasion, Tao of Sexual Mastery). In the article, Dr. Benzer writes about how he hates seeing all of his "smart, educated, lovely female friends remain single, alone and lonely in spite of their best efforts."

Here are the seven things Dr. Benzer believes are keeping all of us smart women from finding the right man:

1. Some smart women put themselves in a no-win bind when it comes to finding an intellectual match.
2. Smart women bring their inner CEO to the date.
3. Smart women don't make love a top priority.
4. Smart women mistake a person for real fulfillment.
5. Smart women overthink it.
6. Smart women underplay their feminine charms.
7. Smart women are waiting for love to show up versus showing up as love.

I'm not sure that I agree with Dr. Benzer on most of these points, though I know #5 will always be true for me. I'm an expert overanalyzer. Read the article and tell me what you think. Do agree with him on any of these. Disagree? Have something to add to the list?

Cougars and Cubs

This is pretty much unrelated to my normal line of blogging, but I've mentioned "cougars" once before so I thought I'd share this story I came across today on the Huffington Post: "Carnival Cruises Bans 'Cougars,' 'Cubs' From Future Trips."

Basically Carnival wants to keep its family friendly image, so it has turned down the request of a singles travel club to have a second "cougar-themed" cruise. What do you think? Should Carnival have done this? Do you want me (and everyone else) to refrain from mentioning "cougars" ever again?